Wednesday, November 25, 2009 @ 7:04 pm
i've never been this tired for so long. skipping tonight's physics class to take a break. head hasn't felt this heavy and filled since i dunno when. i really hate to admit this, but i'm homesick. all throughout the walk back to my room, i've been thinking of how much i miss esplanade rooftop garden. love that place. it's like an oasis in the middle of the breakneck speed of singapore's lifestyle. i like going up there, sometimes alone, sometimes with a close friend or two. and i usually like to start in the esplanade library, browsing through the dance books there and watching dance videos at the space where it overlooks the gargantuan drain canal called the Singapore River. but i hardly stay there for long, and usually move up to the garden. i really love that space, very very much. love the view of the CBD skyscrapers, the waters, and being surrounded by open greenery. once i saw two eagles over the river, and watching them brought a lot of peace to my mind. i love it best when i go there with a close friend or two, and we'd sit cross-legged and just look out over the river, chatting over random stuffs. it's such an open space, yet it provides a little privacy, coz it's one of the few places in town that's hardly crowded. it feels so good, to be in the heart of town, yet enjoying some peace and quiet. and after that, just wandering about esplanade, so empty, so quiet. even the toilets are nice. hahahaha. i miss nice toilets. toilets that have sitting toilet bowls, marble sinks, automatic taps, automatic flushing, toilet paper in every cubicle, covered rubbish bins, with automatic fragrance sprays, hand soap and that cold air hand dryer. okay. it's coz there's no nice toilets here, except in one or two high class malls, and Bank of America Plaza.
and i miss nj's Raintree. where i usually sit by, supposedly studying but end up daydreaming among the leaves of the huge raintree. and i miss dessert's stall durian chendol, and prata hut's momentary masala thosai. i miss the old yong tau foo. actually what i miss most is chatting with Ly in the canteen,over some drink that always finishes too fast. >.< and i miss watching the thunderstorms from the canteen, where the rain comes in sheets covering the whole view. and then, the occasional rainbows. always beautiful, always unforgettable.
and i miss calling up Ly or Andre or both at random times after school to have carrot cake and sugar cane juice at Bt Timah Market. it's so nice, to have friends whom u can call up at really random times, and then they'd go okay, let's go have some food. hahahaha. food. always the best excuse to spend some time together. i really miss that friendship, so natural, honest, spontaneous and willing. it's like we spend time together just because we want to be with one another, and not because of some obligation using friendship as an excuse. and any topic in the world just comes up and flows so naturally. i miss that very very very much. and i miss grandparents' rooftop garden too. so full of flowers of all sorts. grandparents used to care for them when they were healthier. although it's neglected now, it hasn't lost a single bit of its charm. the jasmines are doing much better than the chilli plants, and about to conquer the place. no complaints about that. coz the whole garden is filled with the sweetest jasmine fragrance. and it's a great place to stargaze at night, as long as u're not bitten by mosquitoes. there's this flower that my grandma loved very much, i call it the December flower coz i never know it's real name. it only blooms once a year, in December, and blooms only at night. so at the month of December, my grandma would go up to the garden every night to check on it, and when it finally blooms, she would call me up (coz none of my cousins bother), and i would go up there and admire it with her. she loves that flower the most, always giving it the best care, in order to earn the reward of seeing it bloom at the end of the year. but i dun think i can see that again. anyways, that garden has always been my oasis when i'm in surabaya.
i have yet to find my oasis down here. that's what i keep telling myself. that i have yet to find it, not that i will never find it. i suddenly have this urge to just sit somewhere, surrounded by nothingness, and just look into space, contemplating at the sky and the greenery and just emptying my mind of its too-many contents. i should rise early one weekend morning, go to the nearest park, sit there, read a book.
played basketball today. it's no longer as therapeutic as it used to be. so just sat down and watched the taiwan guys and afro girl play in the other court. they play very well.