Saturday, November 07, 2009 @ 3:17 pm
it's a good Saturday =)) i went to town on my own today to buy groceries in preparation for mum's arrival. lol. empty fridge, no rice, no detergent, no soap. why must everything run out today? T.T so heavy....
but anyways, i wore my favourite dress, put on my fave earrings and shoes, went out. alone. ahhh. no one with me =D plugged on my earphones in the MRT, went to my fave resto. ordered my fave lasagna, and some Spanish Iced Coffee *just iced coffee with vanilla ice cream and whipped cream*. i sat at my table, absorbing the warm ambience, softly singing the lyrics of my favourite ballads playing in the background, and just watching the people around me. and watching the people around me watching me. lol. i was the only one eating alone. other diners were coming in pairs and groups. and i liked watching how they interact. lol. some of them knew how to handle the knife and fork, others were plain hopeless. watching those people eat, was entertainment. food spilling all over the place. hahaha. sorry sir, we don't use chopsticks in this resto. lol. i enjoyed my food, very very much =)) this place is like the only place in this messy city that i can find some peace and quiet to enjoy my food. the waiter and waitresses dun ignore u if u call them, they respond quickly, speak gently, and are civilised. lol. other places just add to my frustration.
i loved the solitude. loved that i was able to listen to the thoughts in my head uninterrupted, and that i could get lost in them. loved that i could go wherever i wanted, do whatever i wanted. i like that i'm comfortable being on my own. lol. and i was thinking to myself, although i'm in this messed up, annoying place, i find that i could find my own teeny bit of space, and that space is actually within. if i just ignore all of these mess, all of these crudeness, let people live their way, and i live my way, then yeah, i can be comfortable, i can be me. i dun have to put on a fierce front all the time just so that people wun get to me. they can be rude, crude, unreasonable, but if i choose to not let them get to me, they won't. i can just ignore them and go my own way. why do i have to stoop to their level anyway? they have their own way of living, i have mine. why bother so much. live and let live. and if they get annoying, just go one level higher and kick them from up there.
i've been conducting emotional and social experiments on the locals, just to see how best to deal with them. hehe. so far, so good ;)