Saturday, April 21, 2007 @ 10:33 pm
Closed.Enter. by me.
Wooden door with rusted hinges
Creaking in the wind
Slammed shut.
A knock came by,
another knock,
another... another... another...
echoooooeeedddd...
Still silent and shut.
It ain't locked
Knocks of no use,
Turn the handle.
Enter.
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took a walk today, in the evening just before the sun took its leave. the cloudy sky took the sunlight away. the colour i felt was blue. feeling a colour, how strange. i dunno. that's what i felt. i thought the world looked blue. was holding a Time magazine in my hand. a picture with the Korean gunman who killed 32 people in America on the page that I held open. maybe i should have closed the magazine and not allow the picture of the man holding two guns be pointing at me. it's all right though.
went on with my walk. asked the security guard for some fish food. went by the stretch of koi pond. stepped on the artificial landscape rocks. the koi fishes swarmed to me, their mouths wide open, closing, opening, closing, opening. looked disgusting and greedy. poured out some fish food, but noticed the little fishes that gathered outside the main swarm, wating for food to fall above their heads. so i poured some in their direction. but the big kois immediately attacked the food with fervour. poor little fishies didn't get to eat. if only fishes knew how to share and not be so selfish. but it's all right.
returned the empty container to the guard and walked around again. wonder why the flowers have all wilted. couldn't smell the sweet scents of the flowers that i love. couldn't smell anything at all. maybe i didn't remember that i smelt anything. it was just nothing. not even the aroma of living leaves, or the fishy smell of the koi ponds. nothing at all. how weird. the air was cool though, and there was a mist hanging down. looks dreamy and lost.
realised that i've lost my ability to appreciate these little things already. forgotten to slow down and stop to look. or maybe the world has lost its colour. the bougainvilleas along the roads dun dazzle me anymore. the trees were just trees. objects placed in a crafted scene. how weird of me. just not feeling like myself at all. so unlike me not to stop to look. going crazy. time to stop running and climb back to the path where i belong.